Control vs True Love

I hate when 'Christian' husbands think they need to control their wives. The Bible never says, 'Husbands control your wives,' it says, 'Husbands love your wives.' Yeah it says men in leadership in the church should have obedient and submissive wives, but that's out of her own will, not that he requires that of her. If men would just humble themselves before God- as well as women, but we're not addressing that at the moment- and let God lead them in being the Spiritual Leader their wives and children need, then their wives would know God and want to serve and seek Him, and that would include wanting to be the helpmeet to their husbands, letting him lead, desiring to build him up, rather than tear him down, all because God loves them, and wants them to love Him, and to love Him, you want to be obedient and honoring to Him, and those are all the ways He wants you to live alongside your husband. The requirement of having an obedient wife to be in leadership in church is not a standard, it's the visible fruit that the husband is leading and loving his wife as God calls him to. It works the same way with Pastors. They're not called to control their flock and keep them from sinning, they're only called to lead the flock, on how to seek God, know Jesus, love Jesus, which will only flourish a natural desire to know God's commands, and obey and honor Him, because we love Him. Finally, God works the same way with us. He doesn't control us or force our obedience, even though He can and has every right to. He gives us freewill, because He doesn't want to control us, He wants to love us, so that we desire to obey and honor Him. He doesn't want obedient robots or bitter slaves, He wants willing people, who love Him, and desire to serve Him. True love is so much stronger than sheer force, and God's love is the One true love.